Just RK

Tomorrow is the girls’ first cheer competition.  In truth, I’m learning that it’s competition for Kinlee’s and exhibition for Braska’s squad.  But it’s performance. In front of a lot of people.  And I fear they won’t even get to the floor. I mean, they LOVE cheer. They really like the practices, the attention from coaches and the teen buddies.  But it’s different when there are lots of strangers looking at them. And yelling. And the music is way louder. I wonder how it will go. I’m not nervous now. I’m trying to think of everything to prepare for.  But I know myself well enough to know that tomorrow, at about 11:05am and 11:25am, I will be one nervous nellie.  Watching them go, or not go, out onto the floor.  Then watching how the routines play out.  I’ll cry, I’m sure.  And I’m not an easy-crying type…  but I know I’ll be proud, and overwhelmed that they’re actually out there, and laughing at how silly the little 3-year-old squad wi...

I love cars.  They’ve been a hobby of mine since before I could drive.  Not like I work on them, but I like the pretty ones, I like the powerful ones, and I like to drive GOOD cars.  I really enjoy driving just for the experience when it’s a well-handling machine with spunky engine. But I’m practical, too.  And especially in the last 2 years, I’m also painfully frugal, out of necessity, mostly.  This creates a problem… Last year we opted/needed to get out of debt, and the only debt we had besides our house was the cars.  Two nice cars. Cars we loved.  I mean, we REALLY liked our cars. We were thankful for them, liked driving them, knew they were going to start when we turned the key and would get us where we were going in comfort and style.  They were “middle of the road” type cars in reality, but to us, they were perfect and we seriously loved our cars, though we NEVER forgot to be thankful for them every day. Used to be mine… ...

There were a couple questions asked after the last post about eyes… Rochelle asked… Has Braska had corrective eye surgery for it? (nystagmus) And Katelyn’s mommy asked… Has Braska had surgery to work on correcting vision? If you have any advice on things we should specifically bring up to her opthamologist, I'd love to hear it! The answer to both is no.  But to elaborate a little, nystagmus is not generally corrected by surgery, or at least it doesn’t generally NEED to be corrected by surgery.  We have been told from day one that is doesn’t really affect Braska’s vision, that it doesn’t cause everything she looks at to shake or wiggle, as it would seem to me.  That said, she does seem to notice it somewhat, because she tries to avoid it, which is what causes the “finding the null point” issue of tipping up, or looking down her nose. As for other corrective surgery, it is possible that Braska may need it at some point, but it would most likely be for ...

A student working on a project on Down syndrome in college posed a question yesterday on one of the forums I frequent. What would you suggest for someone else who is going to have a baby? Would you suggest that they get the amniocentesis or any blood work directed towards finding any potential problems or was it just easier not to know? And this was my response…  I know this is a controversial topic, but I wanted to share my perspective. This is quite a loaded question, in most circles, but I'll answer as honestly as I can.  I didn't know prenatally and I'm very glad that I didn't.  For me, that is because my marriage was in a very fragile place, and if we'd have known this, I'm sure it would have been over before she even arrived.  I would not abort a baby for any reason, so when I was offered an amnio, there was no reason to do it and take any risk related to it.  Even though we struggled with the first couple weeks of adjusting to all the new...

When Braska was born, we were shocked about the news that she had Down syndrome. There had been an abnormal blood test in the second trimester, but combined with the other information from ultrasounds and such, it was decided that the risk was not that much different than my normal risk for age 32. We did not have an amnio because the results would not have changed our course, regardless of what they told us, and I am terrified of needles and would never opt for an elective procedure that uses a big one and invades the baby's personal space. No way. We dismissed the whole thing, for the most part, although I do remember praying after that point that she would not have it. I felt silly for doing so because I was sure she didn't. This is just one more example in my life of how God is way smarter than me. He knew we needed her, just as she is. It took me a while to see that, admittedly, but I got there. I never planned to have kids, for as long as I can remember. The idea ...